Congressional Representative Discovers Shocking New Debate Strategy: Reading Bills Before Voting on Them
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Capitol Hill was thrown into chaos this week when Rep. Patricia Thornfield (D-Vermont) stunned colleagues by implementing a radical new approach to legislation: actually reading proposed bills in their entirety before casting her vote. The unprecedented strategy came to light during Tuesday’s debate on the “American Excellence and Prosperity Enhancement Act,” when […]
Local Actress Launches Groundbreaking Business Venture: Actually Selling Products Instead of Just Posting About Them
LOS ANGELES, CA – The entertainment industry is reeling this week after B-list actress Skylar Valencia-Rodriguez shocked Hollywood by launching a beauty company that sells actual products to real customers, rather than simply posting Instagram stories with discount codes. “I honestly thought she’d lost her mind,” confided Valencia-Rodriguez’s talent agent, speaking on condition of anonymity […]
Tech Company Discovers Revolutionary Cost-Cutting Strategy: Firing People Who Actually Know How to Train AI
SILICON VALLEY, CA – In a groundbreaking business move that has venture capitalists applauding and artificial intelligence researchers frantically updating their résumés, XeneralAI announced this week that they have discovered an innovative approach to reducing operational costs: eliminating the humans who teach their AI systems how to work. “We had this incredible breakthrough moment,” explained […]